While man belongs to the workplace, masjid and battlefield.
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It is obligated for man to find a job even if risking his life into deadly work so he can provide nafkah to his family. Man had to provide nafkah even if there's no saving left for his part or have to be coerced workaholic so he won't fail in providing it.
Man should not feel owed to his wife for her courtesy to cover some of the husband's part of nafkah. It is fucking obligation and must not shrug off such lightness.
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If the wife -especially for newly married phase- said: "Honey. I don't want to stay at in-law family of yours even if for a day! I want our first night and first day in our own house!", the husband is obligated to provide decent shelter to his wife! Either by monthly rent or buy it one. Yes. Husband is obligated to listen this woman's request or demand!
Yes. Providing decent shelter or home is one of the nafkah which man should fulfill it without fail! In other word, man had to provide a house before he engage into marriage for the first place!
Would you tell me how much the cost for monthly rent nowdays? Would you tell me how much the cost of one house today?
How about its utility? You can't live in the house without electricity and water supply. You have to pay it. And husband have to pay its monthly insurance and yearly tax for government.
How about the house's maintanance? Let's say if there is pipe's leakage or wrenched off rooftops resulted from the harsh wind or something else. Or if we facing the flood disaster. How much it would cost to repair those damage? If the family having unexpected disaster such as landslide, how much its cost to provide a new one's shelter?
That's just the house part. How about nafkah for basic living? Providing expenses for kids for school necessity? How much it cost for 20 years of living in raising family?
How about the part of husband when he have his own vehicle, especially car? How much it cost to pay monthly installment? How about its utilities such as gas, road tax and insurance? How about its maintanence?
How about the others that husband obligated to pay? His cellphone bill and many other things?
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The masjid is not merely for Jum'ah pray or hari raya's pray, but 5 times of daily fardh. Some of madzhab said that it is fardh to every man to perform jamaah pray 5 times daily!
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If the ulil amri issue an order to join the battlefield to defend the country and deen, man had to listen and obey the makruf order even if he had no military background.
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Man had to bear this kind of obligation. Of course, whole man would hate this to take on this obligation in their life. But, as the God's servant who have a deep faith and belief that what He arranged for us had a meaningful wisdom, we obey and accept what is becoming our part.
Now, we understand how blessful when Allah state this :
الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللَّـهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَىٰ بَعْضٍ وَبِمَا أَنفَقُوا مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ
"Men are the superior of women as Allah granting more (obligation) for some of them on somebody else and as they providing nafkah from their material". [Surah an-Nisaʾ verse 34].
After we realized what are the part of man's obligation, he is granted for a superior position over woman. That's why he awarded more part in inheritance's division, that's why he granted for sole talak's authority, that's why he had a permission have a polygamy relationship and that's why when he said to his wife: "Stop! Play with me now", she had to obliged.
The reward is befit for his whole life's obligation and burden.
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Then, there is dishwater -who couldn't accept she is dishwater- complaining that Islam being misogynist and unjust for woman for her to cover her aurah, receiving a little in inheritance's division and had no sole's talak authority (while she had an authority to do fasakh. LOL), how man happily to have a four wives and etc etc etc..
Well, f**k you! F**k you! F**k you! F**k you!
Do you know how much convenience you are living as Muslim and how much Islam had providing your wide space to not bear this burden? Islam had giving you not a only justice part, but an ihsan part! Is that doesn't sufficient enough to make you a grateful?
So, if a woman start behaving like a bitch, thot and slut......
while man is deeply concerning how much burden he hate to be impelled on his shoulder, but he had to accept it willingnessly, this man does not f**king care how he will treat her harshly for her not being able to accept the she is dishwater and don't want behave like a decent woman. We will not sorry for it.
We do love and strive for justice, not for bitch!
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Addition note.
-Providing shelter is one of the nafkah which man should fulfill it : https://www.facebook.com/MohdMasriOfficial/posts/3222312901192631
-Hadith about wife should obligated when husband ask her to play with him :
إِذَا دَعَا الرَّجُلُ امْرَأَتَهُ إِلَى فِرَاشِهِ فَأَبَتْ فَبَاتَ غَضْبَانَ عَلَيْهَا لَعَنَتْهَا المَلاَئِكَةُ حَتَّى تُصْبِحَ
"When the husband call his wife to the bed, but she neglect, then he stay at night with furious towards her, the angels will curse her until dawn". [Ṣoḥīḥ al-Bukẖōriyy].
LELAKI TIDAK PERNAH SAMA SEKALI DIKASIHANI
Sedutan penulisan lepas : https://www.facebook.com/marzuka.martilloiii.7/posts/482774329757941
Bila aku kata: "Man belongs to the workplace, masjid and battlefield", tiada siapa pun ingin kasihan pada lelaki.
Menyediakan rumah adalah tanggungjawab suami. Kalau isteri kata: "Aku tak nak duduk di rumah mentua kau. Aku nak malam pertama dan hari pertama di rumah kita sendiri", sang suami wajib dengar permintaan atau desakan isteri ini.
Sama ada sewa bulanan atau beli sebiji. Ya. Menyediakan rumah adalah nafkah yang wajib bagi suami.
Berapa kos rumah pada hari ini? Berapa kos sewa hari ini? Berapa kos utiliti (elektrik, air dan insuran)? Berapa kos untuk maintanance apabila berlaku kerosakan?
Ini semua perlu ada di fikiran suami. Kalau isteri tak nak tolong, suami tiada hak membantah. Sebab ini tanggungjawab asal dan sepenuhnya di bahu lelaki.
Tu belum lagi keperluan nafkah yang lain. Aku tak nak ulang lagi dari penulisan yang lalu.
Kalau suami gagal tunaikan hak asalnya, dia akan dipertanggungjawab di hadapan Allah. Jangan ingat dia terlepas.
Bayangkan, tiada siapa yang kasihan pun yang "lelaki belongs to workpace" apabila faham hakikat tanggungjawab nafkah yang dipikul lelaki.
Tahu tak lelaki wajib cari pekerjaan walaupun merisikokan diri dalam bahaya supaya dapat tunaikan hak nafkah tanpa gagal? Tahu tak lelaki perlu juga tunaikan nafkah walaupun tiada simpanan untuk dirinya dan walaupun perlu workaholic?
Tak ada siapa pun kasihan. And lelaki pun terima hakikat ini tanggungjawab mereka dan mereka pun perlu terima hakikat yang mereka tidak dikasihani dalam urusan nafkah ini. Tak ada siapa pun kasihan. Biasalah kalau bab duit ini, semua nak sendiri-sendiri dan asing-asing.
Tapi, bila aku sebut: "Woman belongs to the kitchen", terus jadi ribut dan tidak keruan.
What the hell? Can't accept the reality, bitch?
Sedangkan aku tak teragak-agak nak kata yang lelaki perlu bekerja keras untuk tunaikan beban yang dipikul di bahu mereka walaupun hujung bulan mereka sengkek. Sedangkan aku tak teragak-agak nak kata yang lelaki perlu taat pada pemerintah yang makruf jika dititah untuk menyertai peperangan mempertahankan negara dan agama. Sedangkan aku menegaskan yang lelaki mesti melazimi masjid. Dan lelaki perlu terima realiti ini.
Aku kata: "Wajib bagi lelaki sediakan rumah dan penuhi. Nafkah wajib dipenuhi walaupun tiada simpanan untuk diri". -- Meh! Itu kan korang punya tanggungjawab.
"Woman belongs to the kitchen". --- Waarrrrgggghhh!!! You're such a misogynist!
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Aku anti-feminis? LOL. Tahu tak penulisan itu aku sedang membela wanita? Maksudnya, para wanita sama sekali tidak bertanggungjawab sepenuhnya untuk urusan rumah dari pembelian sehinggalah ke maintanance.
Cakap pada suami: "Saya tak mahu hulur duit untuk urusan rumah. Semua itu pakai duit awak". Suami tak boleh bantah. Suami wajib dengar cakap perempuan bab ini.
Cakap pada suami: "Aku tak sukalah duduk rumah mentua". Suami patut cepat-cepat cari rumah sendiri. Seronok kan perempuan sekali cakap, suami terus bergegas carikan rumah idaman isteri?
Suami tiada hak untuk mendesak isteri untuk berikan peruntukan walaupun sedikit daripada isteri pada bab nafkah utama. Kalau aku jumpa lelaki yang tampar isteri sebab isteri tak nak bayarkan ansuran rumah, aku akan maki kat lelaki tu. Jangan risau. Tiada diskriminasi jantina.
Tak seronok ke perempuan yang mereka boleh berlepas diri untuk tidak hulur duit untuk membayar duit rumah? Kan best jadi dishwater sebenarnya. Tak perlu hulur duit sangat.
Kenapa perlu terasa bila disebutkan wanita belongs to the kitchen? Nak tanggung sepenuhnya duit nafkah rumah yang sepatutnya dipikul suami? Nak tanggung sepenuhnya duit perbelanjaan anak? Terpulanglah. Aku pun suka. Lelaki yang lain pun lagilah suka.
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Penulisan aku ini walaupun memang ada untuk tagih simpati kepada para wanita supaya memahami bagaimana beban yang dipikul suami dalam hidup mereka, tetapi kalau tidak mahu simpati pun tidak mengapa.
Yang penting, berperilakulah seperti dishwater yang sejati. Tolonglah jangan jadi jadi bitch, thot dan slut yang tidak reti bersyukur nikmat dia menjadi seorang perempuan dan tanggungjawab yang dibahagikan kepadanya.
Ini antara poin utama aku. Kalau wanita tak nak tolong suami bayarkan sewa atau ansuran rumah, mohon jangan jadi sial sangat.
Aku tidak seksis dan myisogynist totok. Ada je kawan perempuan aku yang boleh behave cantik, berseri dan anggun bak rupanya. Aku istimewakan layanan aku pada mereka. Tetapi, yang perangai celaka ini memang patut dilanyak.
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Aku sedang bicara tentang hukum asal. Suami wajib sediakan rumah untuk isteri kalau isteri minta. Kalau isteri tak nak tolong, suami tiada hak membantah.
Tetapi, dari segi maslahat dan nilai spiritual dalam perkahwinan, apakah langsung tiada sifat ihsan daripada isteri? Apakah sampai tak tolong langsung untuk bantu 1/3 atau separuh atau seringgit pun paling kedekut jika mengaku perkahwinan itu terbina atas rasa kasih sayang dan cinta?
Ya, urusan nafkah makanan, lelaki perlu sediakan beras dan keperluan masakan yang lain, tetapi takkan tak boleh tolong walau untuk cover lauk pauk yang dalam ruang lingkup tahsiniyyat dan hajiyyah? Lebih-lebih lagi jika sudah tahu yang hidupnya sekadar biasa, bukan mewah, malah dalam kesempitan.
Dan bila suami gagal untuk penuhi tanggungjawab asalnya, lebih-lebih kerana culas dan lalai, isteri boleh tuntut fasakh.
Kalau tak nak fasakh pun, kalau suami larang isteri bekerja, maka isteri tak wajib taat perkara yang mungkar dari lidah orang yang culas dalam nafkah. Isteri bekerja kerana memenuhi apa yang dilalaikan suami, bukan menggantikan tanggungjawab nafkah.
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